For Anybody Out There Keeping Score

I just got home from yet another 12 hour day and didn’t have any problems with that fucking Bronco for once.

My little work around the other day of unplugging the damn idle speed solenoid and cranking in the hard stop screw seems to have worked.

Nicely, actually.

It looks like I’ll take that as an increasingly rare win.

Score one for the stubborn old man.

And Fuck You Napa, your incompetent suppliers, counter people and supervisors.

That goes double for Ford Motor Company.

When that damn processor finally gets here all I can say is it better fucking work or

I am going to go Ape, Fucking, Shit, on somebody.

Google Announces Security Breach In Google+ That Affected 500,000 Users Seven Months After It Happened, Is Closing The Network”Because Nobody Uses It”

Is that not the lamest excuse they could possibly come up with?

This is going to bite them right in the ass, as it should, because they didn’t tell anyone fearing oversight and regulation.

There are a lot of people , including myself, who think that is exactly what should happen anyway.

Google+ social network is being killed, because of a privacy breach and because people just don’t use it

The consumer version of Google+ will be wound down over 10 months, ending by August, the company said.

The enterprise version of Google+ is to continue.

Google said it discovered the privacy breach in March, which allowed third-party apps using the Google+ Application Programming Interface to access personal details that the user had marked as private, including name, work experience, birth date, email address and places lived.

Shortly before Google’s Monday announcement, the Wall Street Journal reported that Google executives were informed of the privacy breach in March, at which point they fixed the gap, but chose to not disclose it to its users or the public for fear of tarnishing its image. According to the report, a memo that Google’s legal team prepared for senior executives said that going public with the breach would likely trigger “immediate regulatory interest” at a time when Facebook Inc. was coming under fire for not preventing the data firm Cambridge Analytica from accessing troves of user information

10:40 a.m.: This article was updated with information about the Wall Street Journal report.

This article was originally published at 10:35 a.m.


My bold.

Oh yeah, there is going to be pain in their future.

It’s about fucking time.

When The Wife Is Away,

The cast iron comes out to play.




Yes sir, everything a man needs right there.

Salt, Pepper, Chili Powder. Garlic Salt, Boneless Pork Chops and Fried Taters and Onions.

Real Food.

It was delicious.

I’ve even got most of the mess cleaned up already, just gotta go wipe out the frying pans.

I’m waiting for them to finish cooling off.

Since she and the boy are up in Seattle watching a football game and probably eating crappy $15 hot dogs, I think I’m doing OK here.


I May Have Just Trick Fucked That Damn Bronco For A Temporary Fix

I got to thinking about that damn thing a while ago and the thought came to me that the only problem I am having with this computer issue is that it keeps fucking with the idle speed.

Last night I went to the store and it wanted to idle at 3,000 RPM. Yeah, that ain’t gonna fly.

It just dawned on me. The computer is using the Idle Air Bypass solenoid to accomplish this fuckery.

I just went out and started it, cranked the idle hard stop screw in a bit, unplugged that fucking solenoid and then adjusted the idle speed to 900 RPM.



Now the computer can’t fuck with it anymore.

The wife and youngest boy went up to Seattle early this morning so they can watch the Rams kick the shit out of the Seahawks which means I am watching our oldest boy who is autistic.

She needs a day off once in a while so I try to step up to the plate and help make that happen.

That means I more than likely won’t be driving the Bronco anywhere until tomorrow. Either way, I still have the Caballero.

I’d like to thank everyone for their suggestions and offers of help. you know who you are.


It’s not a money issue, it’s a stubborn old bastard problem.

Unfortunately that condition seems to be permanent and worsening by the day.

There is only one cure for it and you will know when it happens because this blog won’t be getting updated anymore after that.

Raise Your Hand If You Didn’t See This Coming

Because I did, it never seems to fail lately.

I went out late last night to see if that Bronco would start just because.

It did, just barely.

I could hear that new fuel pump running but instead of running for a second, building pressure and shutting off, it just kept running.

I went out there this morning and it did the same thing except this time it was a No Start.

To say I was pissed off would be a great understatement.

Furious would be closer.

So then of course then it turned into a complete shit show, calling and dealing with those dumb motherfuckers at NAPA again.

To be courteous, I am going to give you the condensed version.

They don’t have another one. Yes, they still have my original one.

Good, I will be in to get it back.

I need another one one ASAP so I can get back and forth to work.

Drive over there with the new one after taking the sonofabitch back out and hear this,

The fastest we can get one is from the vendor in PhillyFuckingDelphia and we can’t get it here before next Friday.

I am going out of town for the weekend next Friday.

Why don’t you try a U-Pull It wrecking yard?

(Insert look of stunned disbelief  on my part here)

Why don’t YOU  give me my old ECM and money back, order the fucking new one and call me when it gets here.

I swear to God, I have been buying parts from NAPA for FORTY FUCKING YEARS NOW

I have slowly witnessed not only the quality of their parts go in the toilet but especially, the quality of their hired help.

The young man behind the counter had no clue how to complete the transaction nor correctly order the part, the surly old bitch who someone has pathetically put in charge because of Muh Diversity or something can see that I am completely fucking pissed off, will not even look at me nor talk to me and completely fucking ignores me while she schools the dumb kid on how to do his fucking job, then announces she is going to lunch and might as well have told me to go fuck myself on the way out.

I’m sure she could see that I was close to grabbing someone by the throat and choking the life out of them so she was careful to stay just out of reach as she did all this..

They used to have competent parts people behind the counter but have literally run them all off.

I am all done with these cocksuckers.

So I got the electrons transferred back into my account, grabbed my old processor and walked out the fucking door.

On my way home I decided to swing by another parts place that has been a stalwart community member for over thirty years that I have been going to to see what they had to say.

I swear to you on my Mother’s grave, it was almost exactly the same thing.

Dumb kid behind the counter, didn’t know how to order the part, had to have another guy come over and hold his hand throughout the entire process and BEST OF ALL, find out they have to get it from THE EXACT SAME SUPPLIER AS NAPA, back in PhillyFuckingDelphia, except even better, it will take TWO WEEKS!

I thanked them for their time, snagged my old processor off the counter, came home, put that dirty motherfucker BACK In again and the cocksucker went VROOOM and started right the fuck up.

I am so pissed off and disgusted right at the moment I am beside myself.



The Internet Fixed My Bronco!

Praise Jesus, I think I finally got that dirty motherfucker whipped.

That thing has had a bizarre idle problem since before I got it, witnessed by a whole slew of new parts that were on it I saw the first time I opened the hood.

I personally have been fucking with it off and on since I got the damn thing.

I know the EGR valve was fucked up and so was the position sensor for it because the Check Engine light kept coming on but I finally got that issue resolved. Ever since then the idle would randomly jump up anywhere from 1200 to 2500 RPM without warning

. This could be very exciting when you are sitting at a light behind someone daydreaming and not paying any attention when all of a sudden the engine roars and the whole rig lurches forward like a pissed off Lion on a leash.

Much puckering of asshole ensues, every fucking time.

The thing is, there is no more Check Engine light on and no fucking codes.

Just really vicious Gremlins playing fucky fuck games.

From long ago past experience I remembered that these things have an Intake Air temperature sensor on them and when they go bad, what happens is that they think it is -40 degrees outside. They don’t kick a code either if my faulty memory is correct. The computer just looks at it, says OK and richens the fuel mixture up like a motherfucker like the choke on a carburetor is stuck closed because it thinks the engine is somewhere near the North Pole and it wants to make sure it is getting enough fuel.

This is obviously not a good thing.

So off to Youtube Land I went, looking for videos and information on those dirty little bastards. They tend to get carboned up on the business end which is inside the intake manifold.

I really didn’t find too much but after one video got done playing, one of the Suggested videos over on the side bar caught my attention. Something about High Idle Problems on an F-150 about the same vintage as the bronco.

The Bronco is basically a really short F-150 with a factory installed canopy anyway so I dove in to see what that one was all about.

It wasn’t too long before the little light came on.

The guy had the exact same problems I was experiencing but he finally found the root cause and was nice enough to share his findings.

God Bless You Sir!

And what was the exact cause of all of this shared misery?

This cocksucker.


The guy I bought it from mentioned that the computer might be fucked up but he is no mechanic and back in the day when I was still working on those fuckers for a living, the odds of a CPU shitting the bed were something like 1,000 to 1.

99% of the time it was something else.

Well, that was thirty years ago and apparently they haven’t aged well since then.

What the YouTube guy found when he opened the damn thing up was several burned up capacitors.

Then there were a few more videos from other guys and they had run into the same thing after pulling their hair out and throwing very expensive ,hard to get to, parts at their trucks. It didn’t matter what engine it was either. Just that they were in Ford trucks of that era.

So I rolled the dice and ordered one up today. NAPA offered several reman units at varying prices, depending on what you wanted to spend, on their website. They actually showed several being in stock at my local NAPA store.

It was lying.

When I called with a part number I got a zero available ANYWHERE answer even though the website showed them having one on hand. I started down the list, them getting more expensive as I went.

I finally hit a winner at $99 with a $98 Core Charge.

That is not a typo.

The website also stated that they needed the VIN number and the OE number off the CPU.

Guess what that means?


Follow the little red wire down the hose on the right until you get to the first Zip Tie and you can see the head of the bolt you have to get at to take the huge fucking wire connection plug off.

You have to pull it out to see the numbers on it.

All the instructions I found kept saying you had to take the front wheel off and then the inner fender had to come loose to get the thing out.



That rusty thing is part of the foot operated E brake assembly.


It’s inside, up in the Kick Panel hidey hole, BEHIND the fucking E Brake assembly.

I obviously got it out but it was LOTS of fun as you can imagine.

I went and got the new one, stuffed the bastard back in there, put everything back together inside, put the big connector back on and hooked the battery up.

I sat and had a smoke and said a couple silent prayers, then reached in and cranked it over.

I’ll be damned if it didn’t start.

So I informed Wifely Unit to keep the phone handy and took it for a spin.

Night and Day.

No more high idle, a nice sedate 7-800 RPM. As a matter of fact, after I put gas in it, it didn’t want to start until I pushed the gas pedal down a bit. The engine then started surging trying to establish an idle speed. It has done that several times now so I unplugged the Idle Speed Air Bypass Solenoid and the engine died completely. I see the little bastard of a Hard Stop idle speed screw has been chewed up by Bubba and his Vise Grips so I am going to have to fuck with that now. You unplug the solenoid, and set the idle speed to a default setting without computer assist so you have a base RPM, then you plug it back in and the computer adjusts the idle speed as it deems necessary from there.

That is obviously not where it needs to be.

It also takes time for the computer to learn my driving habits because they do actually do that and adjust things accordingly.

One of the first things I did after I got out on the road was to mash the gas pedal to the floor and hold it there until I hit 50 miles an hour..

Learn quickly and remember that throttle position you fucker, you will be seeing it often.

I’m just fucking tickled to have this issue resolved finally, I hope.

We shall see but it is already way the fuck better. It didn’t even try to kick the idle up over where it is supposed to be.

I needed to get this issue fixed before the snow and ice started flying this Winter.

I can vividly imagine what would happen if I was trying to get up and down these hills around here in slippery conditions and that fucker all of a sudden deciding 2500 RPM’s was in order when I was wanting to crawl at a slow idle, behind someone else.

No Thanks.

On to the next issue, that fucking ABS light.

Well THAT Was Pleasant

I  just got woke up at 11:18 sharp out of a sound sleep by a screaming National Alert on my phone which was mere inches from my head.

Fuck me, it’s gonna be a long day now, I was up until 6:30 this morning but there ain’t no way I’m getting back to sleep after that adrenaline hit.

I’m awake now for sure.


Looks like Trump likes to cover all his bases and want’s to make sure it works for when he declares Martial Law.

(Fixed, thanks, wasn’t quite awake yet)



You Know The Drill



Them  boys can flat tear it up.

Saw them with Slayer and while  a lot of the people there were probably like me, wanting to see Slayer on their farewell tour, there was a huge crowd there just for these guys and now I know why, they stole the fucking show.