I’m Not A Roofer But I Do Have Some Extra Shingles Someone Can Have

Actually, I’m not sure I would even wish this on Dick Fucking Cheney.

That picture doesn’t even come close to doing it justice.

It is angry red, raised up and welted.

Even better, I have it on the inside too.

That’s where all of my gut pain has been coming from.

They hit me with some Dulotid at the hospital and I finally got some sleep for the first time in 3 days.

They did a Cat Scan and said they didn’t see any diverticulitis so they can only assume this is also running amok inside me.

It happens.

There isn’t much they can do for this shit apparently. I have some Anti Viral pills to take and a couple days worth of pain pills.

I am only using those when I need to sleep. Otherwise I don’t get any.

Think of the last intense intestinal cramp you had, add 2 to 4 more of those simultaneously, a few muscle spasms in the lower back from the cramps you get trying to hold your guts in and flashes of searing pain going through your guts all at the same time and you will get the idea.

It doesn’t stop until the pain medication kicks in either.

It’s a miserable motherfucker. The rash on the outside is nothing compared to that shit.

Anyway, I have been trying to sleep as much as possible. I am up now to get some water and take a leak then I am heading right back at it.

I would like to thank everyone for their well wishes.

I am a lucky guy in that sense.

Gonna try and go to work, we shall see.

46 thoughts on “I’m Not A Roofer But I Do Have Some Extra Shingles Someone Can Have

  1. Good news on the diverticulitis, but internal shingles is nothing to laugh at either. The antivirals will help some. You are gonna have to power through and at the end you will be a better man, what doesn’t kill you makes you more of an old curmudgeon… Get well buddy and have the wife unit smear some calamine lotion.

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  2. NO nononononononononoNO
    Stay freakin’ home!!! The stress at work is gonna put you under if you do. Remember that CHECK ENGINE light? It’s flashing red now. Pay attention to the Doc’s orders.
    Just sayin’

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  3. Good on you Phil, and what egorr said, please. But you disappoint me, you’re not sure you’d wish it on Dick cunting Cheney? The architect of 9/11?, with ground glass added internally, yes.

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  4. Deathray, I don’t mind any humourous insults, you can even call me Arsehole John, whatever. But forget the Aussie bit, as Australians are just pathetic sheeple, and I’m ashamed of the useless cunts, can not be proud to be one anymore. Even to score a shapely redhead.

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      • Deathray, you’d just start calling me Wetback Jack. Lucky for you that Phil is a bit better now, and I’m not really a hateful person, though despondent at the attitude of my countrymen. Two things: 1. The Queensland state election is due Oct 31. The QEC approved last minute registration of 300,000 new voters, this in a population of 5 million. So, was there a whole lot of rooting going on in 2002, with fecundity? Or are other states now missing voters? Or maybe 300,000 resurrections occured? I’m not wondering how those will vote, seeing as the incumbent ALP government (think lefty Democrat) was in deep shit. 2. ASIO, our secret police will now openly use facial recognition technology to monitor the people. Would you expect a stir about such in your country? The response here, as you lot do say, crickets.

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    • More to the point: Fuck Work.
      I once worked for a company that thought my labor for them was worth more than my health or safety. And I egotistically thought I was indispensable.
      The end result was I worked my ass into a disability.
      It’s been ten years now and they’ve yet to call and beg me to come back.

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  5. So Phil, we know you are really crook and all, but enquiring juvenile minds wanna know, did you do okay with the pretty young nurses? Or did you get some old harridan that Cederq must’ve trained with back in the dim ’70s? Go on, make shit up if necessary, so we can vicariously follow Phil’s Night With The Naughty Young Nurses!

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    • Better just leave that in the world.
      Never give grief to anyone that can stick pointy objects in you for any reason, or no reason at all.

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  6. Phil and readers, a terrific panacea for bowel cramps and spasms is derived from a native Australian plant, an ages-old blackfella bush medicine that the pioneer settlers latched onto as well, the tablets retail as Buscopan. The drug compound is Hyoscine Butylbromide. I thoroughly recommend it if suffering from Irritable Bowel Syndrome and if your diverticulars are giving pain (but a case of diverticulitis must be under professional care) or for convulsive shits and general stomach pain too. The wimmens get a win too, for their menstrual cramps. It is unregulated here, and I’ve found it gentle on oldies’ chronic gut problems, without blocking you up. I swear by it for anything between throat to bumhole, lessens old farts’ farts and stops them stinking so much: I can stay in the same room as myself! So I reckon a whole lot of you will benefit.

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  7. I’ve never heard of internal shingles before. Wow, that is some weird shit. I hope you beat that quick. Must be like fire ants that are in the inside. I guess killing it with liquor wouldn’t work – hey, its hand sanitizer right.

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  8. The VA has offered me the Shingles vaccine in the past. Being the person I am , has me questioning all vaccines any more…
    Like all politicians , I too don’t don’t trust anything they say…including the current one !
    I hear that shit hurts bad too , and believe me I know pain….

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  9. Memo for Deathray, if you keep some Buscopan at The Secret Mountain Lair, even with you and Cederq holed up all winter, the air venting will be a lure for elk and moose to shoot for tucker: they’ll be too busy wondering where the rose garden is growing, that is producing such an enticing aroma! Injun and Inuit maidens will wander miles, tracking the scent of such clean manly men. Na, nup, scrub that falsehood, any grizzlies sniffing the hydrocarbons emanating from you pair will imagine a skunks’ graveyard hidden under the snow, wolverines will cower from threat of a predatory monster, polecats would be pole-axed!

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  10. Thanks for the offer of the extra shingles, but we’ve just been re-roofed. After a good friend came down with a really severe case (I think it was about ten years ago) that wiped him out for several months, I decided on the Zostavax (I’m one of the guys who eats several apples a day just to stay away). A number of recent cases in the Sarasota area made me decide to start the first of the Shingrix (new shingles vaccine) shots (the second one’s due in 6 months). My doc said since I’m medically fragile (and Medicare’s paying most of it), he wanted me to take it; won’t prevent it, necessarily, just that the odds are better.

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  11. Buddy of mine got that crap on his shoulder. It is a gift that keeps on giving. If you can skate work for a couple days, that may help it go away quicker. Stress seems to bring it out. Praying for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Just in case, As someone mentioned on your first post about this, they have a vaccine for shingles. Don’t know if you can get this twice, but wouldn’t hurt eh? 2 shots 6 months apart.

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  13. Having shingles is a thrill that life has denied me…so far (knock on wood), so I can’t commiserate with you. I have heard, though, that the pain can be almost beyond description.

    Hope those magical drugs kick in ASAP, and I’ll echo some of the other comments and suggest that you take (at least) an extra day off work. If that place is still shut down, they won’t be losing any production if the job takes a few days longer.

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  14. Take it easy. My understanding is that this is something you have to ride out. I think I’m going to go get that shingles vaccine.

    Here’s a funny story to get your mind off it for a sec. I was in the hospital a few years back with asthma, allergies, a major sinus infection and bronchitis all at the same time. By the time I had been in a few days the nurses figured out they could talk straight with me. As I was checking out a nurse came in with a shot in her hand and said “Do you want to get the pneumonia vaccine, Because if you get pneumonia you’re gonna die.” I said “yes” and rolled up me sleeve. She said “that ain’t where it goes”. You can figure the rest out. Get well.

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  15. Egads, Phil. Take a few days off if you can. egorr and the guys have it right, I’m thinking.
    If they hit you with Dilaudid (I’m assuming that’s the “Dulotid”) they’re not fucking around. Take your cue from the hospital people. Cederq and the other medical folks may have different experiences, but where I come from, you break out the Dilaudid only for real-deal serious pain. (It’s an opioid – like morphine – but about 6x more potent, meaning more bang per mg. Addictive too. Also, PROTIP: showing up in a ER and asking for Dilaudid by name gets you tagged with “drug seeker” in about 35 milliseconds. Even if you’re not.)

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      • Just thought I’d throw this in here – you might want to take a little milk of magnesia with the pain meds. I’ve been on Dilaudid before with kidney stones and that shit will constipate you like crazy. I’m not a doctor but I’ve damn sure been a patient!

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  16. That sucks. My wife had shingles a few years ago, and it wasn’t pleasant. When I found out they had a shingles vaccine, I took it as soon as I was able.

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  17. It may not help with the pain now, but it is a huge relief that you’re not looking at a bowel resection with or without a colostomy. Do be aware that one of the most common side effects of opioids is that they stop up your bowels and you’ll plug up in short order. Miralax may become your friend.

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  18. Been there, done that so I understand how nasty shingles can be. One thing to consider is what to do when you get through this and the virus resumes being dormant. When I dealt with shingles a few years ago, my doctor recommended a vaccine after the outbreak subsided. I did what the doctor ordered and I’ve been clear ever since.

    Something to think about.

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  19. OH FUCK, PHIL!!!! JUST STAY HOME, GET WELL…. SHINGLES IS DANGEROUS FOR OLD GUYS LIKE YOU AND ME…. STAY THE FUCK SAFE!!! LISTEN TO THE DOC, EVEN THOUGH I KNOW WE DON’T TRUST THEM TOO DAMNED MUCH!!!
    KEEP US POSTED ON YOUR PRGRESS, BROTHER!!!
    TAZ…

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  20. Phill, I have shingles outbreaks, I find that popping a few zinc supplements when I feel them coming on helps greatly . Had outbreak that welted up in just a few hours and firmly believe zinc stopped them. YMMV. I am extremely leery of vaccine but docs have told me”…it couldn’t hurt”

    Liked by 1 person

  21. My aunt has had a lot of relief using colloidal silver in treating her shingles. Give it a look and don’t believe anything the FDA says.

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  22. My sister had shingles. Took a long time to go away
    Chicken pox virus round two
    It hides in nerve tissue, can pop up when you’re older

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  23. Get your hands on some lidocaine gel and it will probably become your best friend. For your skin,
    University of California – San Diego. “Smoked Cannabis Proven Effective In Treating Neuropathic Pain.” ScienceDaily. ScienceDaily, 25 October 2007. .”

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  24. I had them 2014 and took L-lysine, 8000 mg a day, gone in about a week. Pain gone in a couple of days. Now take at least 1000mg a day and have not had them since.

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  25. Dunno about treating the virus Phil, but a strong non-opioid that won’t bind up your guts is Palexia (tapentadol hydrochloride). I use it for chronic acute pain. Get well soon, or at least find a Commie to rant at and make fun of.

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  26. My wife has been dealing with nerve damage from shingles for almost thirty years now. Other than opioids, the one drug that best controls her pain is Amitriptyline. It was originally developed as an antidepressant, but in low doses it was found to ease chronic neuropathic pain (pain due to nerve damage). A side benefit is that it also helps insomnia, so it is best taken just before bedtime, when it doesn’t hurt to be somewhat drowsy.

    Here’s more info:.

    https://www.nhs.uk/medicines/amitriptyline-for-pain/

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