Carnak Says, A Brass Pole

The question, in the plainly sealed envelope, which has been kept in a mayonnaise jar on Funk and Wagnel’s porch since Noon today, is….

What do you see in this young lady’s future?

30 thoughts on “Carnak Says, A Brass Pole

    • Oh, look what the cat dragged in. I thought you might be bunking in at the mountain lair of Microwave-ray. Sorry, I don’t catch the reference, cultural or otherwise. My phone’s screen is 4 x 7cm, and only shows still images. What is the joke?


      • Have you ever heard of Johnny Carson or The Tonight Show that ran for what, thirty years?
        Carnak was one of Johnny’s regular gags.

        Am I going to have to take up a collection to get you something that you can use the actual fucking internet with?
        A tablet or small laptop would probably be like a miracle for you.
        Say the word Aussie and I’ll make it happen.


        • If you end up starting a fund drive or something for him, please make sure it talks in hillbilly and not adulterated pig latin.
          Damn I’m tired of trying to figure out what he’s rambling on about when he gets on a rant.


        • Jeepers Phil, what is a pad, like what you write with? It’s cool, I’m trying to walk farther now, through the pain. Made it into the IGA today, shop girls all sympathy! Near killed me, but. Just imagine if Cederq had been a nurse when the neurosurgeon went in, he’d be feeding the chihuahua all the scraps! I don’t have TV, but I’ve read that name, and Letterman?


      • My apologies, he has a pic of a young gal climbing a door frame up one side, across the header and down the other side with the caption about being a pole stripper when she gets older, my bad. It is too damn cold in DR’s lair and too damn much snow…


          • Yes DR, it is. And yes, not only kids measure them, old farts have to see how much shrinkage happened. Not ballsack length but, they stretch each year. Cederq probably measures his old-fella in millimetres instead, so it sounds longer on hook-up site ads. Saw the CH Ruler site once, that was funny! I suggested that you had to shoot downhill, as I thought that is the only place a hillbilly could see that far in a straight line! Hey, any chance you’re a rellie to Jethro Bodine? Old granny Clampett would be a good girlfriend for Cederq, if she was around still.


      • Cederq, me, grouchy? I thought that was your prerequisite? Re Poles in Australia, if I’m not missing some odd joke of yours, then yes. Post WWII, we required millions of emigrants, and as the White Australia Act was in place until the early ’70s, meant all Europeans (including Pommy bastards!) were welcome, if they were not Commies!


          • I think they had to replace them with stainless steel, the brass wore too easy. But if you’re a beach goer, you’d see as much. Do you still sit in the front row, dropping Zimbabwean dollar notes for the girls?


          • You caught me with the upper-case Pole, instead of pole. I went to the Palomino club in Las Vegas years ago, wasn’t looking at any hardware fittings at the time.


  1. What do you see in this young lady’s future?
    Two hours a day of fingertip pullups, then blog postings from halfway up Yosemite.


  2. What do you see in this young lady’s future?
    I see a part in a horror movie for her. Add a little makeup and a raspy voice, a haunted house. etc.


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