8 thoughts on “Damn, They’re On To Me

  1. Damn Phil, I think they are on to a lot of us! I use to hide when we had meetings, what a freaking waste of time and air. All the same bull shit and know nothings preaching to ya. Worse was HR having diversity shit and saying white man bad… the dumb fucks that got hurt was the people of color. Whites had family and a mortgage to pay, he couldn’t afford to get hurt.


    • You failed sexual harassment? I didn’t know it was a pass/fail grading, I always thought it was like figure skating, ya got points for style, for jumps and swooshing and required hand placement on your female partner, where had you been in a bar would get you slapped or a phone number that worked.


      • When I was at the dealership, my ex started stalking me. She worked there a couple days a week Tard Farming. There were a couple of guys from a group home for sexually deviant special needs guys that would come in and clean up the offices and take out the garbage. One day she had on a pair of very light tan, almost white pants and when she sauntered by swinging her ass I reached out with a greasy hand and slapped her on the ass.
        Come to find out later when she walked through the waiting room later someone saw the big greasy hand print on her ass and complained about it so I got to go through round two.
        When it was really hot in the Summer I would wear coveralls with nothing under them. I would be bent over a fender working on something and she would come up behind me, reach through the slits in the sides and start playing with my dick.
        Nasty little thing.


        • You got points for style and technique… You got another 8 hours in hell cuz this other person turned you in? They were jealous you didn’t slap them on their ass, that is what it boiled down to. People can’t mind their own fucking business. The only one that had a complaint was the slap happy ex, nobody else. Fucking morons. That is why I am glad I no longer work. I would at my advanced age of curmudgeoness I would be going postal on a weekly basis and removing them from the gene pool and converting oxygen to carbon dioxide.


  2. It comes to mind that was 16 hours of sexual harassment training is time you ain’t never gonna get back. I bet the instructor that taught this training was uglier then sin and would not get a date at 2am at a black bar…


  3. I have had to endure hundreds of safety meetings in my career. I even led a
    few dozen myself. Pick a topic that was covered several times and simply
    regurgitate it. I would usually say something witty at the end like don’t get
    your dick caught in your zipper.

    My all-time best was an all-day First Aid CPR and AED class. To set this up,
    the Red Cross Nurse covered what to do in case of childbirth. My mom told
    me as a teenager that when the time came, no power on Earth can stop it.
    Some dumb fuck of a Tour Boss (shift manager) asked if there was any way
    to delay the delivery. Ever the smart ass, I put my hand up and said sure,
    just grab a hammer and big cork!

    The Nurses mom must have told her the same thing because she nearly doubled
    over laughing.


    • I worked OB and babies don’t wait for nobody, if the doc ain’t there, us nurses was the attending and I caught a lot of pop outs… They are slippery little devils believe me.


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