I swear, if I have to deal with just one more STUPID FUCKING BIMBO behind the counter of an auto parts store, I am going to lose my shit.
While I was thrashing around on that Bronco last weekend trying to get those broken bolts out of the heads, I managed to break the gulp valve for the air injection system that is mounted on a tube that goes between the heads behind the intake manifold.
It must have been rotten to begin with because all I did was bump it trying to get at those bolts and it just split into two pieces.
So I get up today and gird my loins for what I know in my heart is going to be a pain in the ass, gulp down some coffee and head up to the local parts house I have been dealing with.
I have run into a couple of dumbasses up there but for the most part they have people that know what the fuck they are doing, including a nice lady who is probably in her late thirties. When the dumbfuck kid picked exhaust manifold gaskets instead of intake manifold gaskets last weekend and I had to go right back up there, she looked them up right away went and pulled them and then made sure they were the right parts.
So don’t be thinking that hey, this Phil guy is just a hateful old mysoginistic bastard who likes to be hatin’ on the Split Tails.
Absolutely not true. I once trained a ninety pound soaking wet 19 year old girl to work on brand new Lincoln Town Cars and when I was done she could strip a dashboard and have it ready to pull to get to the heater core by herself in an hour and a half.
It’s the stupid people I don’t have time for and I lay the blame squarely on the owners and managers of these places that turn these incompetent motherfuckers loose on the general public without proper training or qualifications in the first place.
When we as consumers who have very busy lives go into an established business we expect competent help and by every measurable metric, those places who don’t supply that competent help should be punished by a severe lack of business.
It’s called Word of Mouth and bad news spreads fast people.
Schucks, Autozone and every place who even remotely imitates their business practices should be avoided at all costs.
Even NAPA, who at one point was universally considered to be just one step below the actual dealership in regards to knowledge and parts availability, has turned into a fucking joke. I walk in, there is a frumpy middle aged woman manager and a bunch of clueless idiots behind the counter.
If they can’t find what you are looking for on their computer in less than two minutes you might as well walk the fuck back out the door because they are incapable of tapping into an unwritten knowledge base that is only acquired by years of experience, including hands on wrenching on vehicles and equipment.
Which is what virtually every NAPA store I ever walked into in the last forty years had.
Once inside the door you were greeted by some gray haired old fart with gnarly scarred up knuckles who knew every parts interchange by heart.
You need a water pump for a 77 Chevy Caprice and the computer said they were out?
Well, the water pump off of a 68 truck will fit and we have four of those.
That kind of knowledge is priceless and is also now pretty much impossible to find.
If the ALMIGHTY COMPUTER says we don’t have it, we can order it and it will be in next week.
So after the place I go to didn’t have this valve on hand, the guy tells me that he can have it in about two hours.
Me, being in a hurry and knowing better, asks where the next nearest parts house is.
Autozone is down the road a couple of miles.
I thanked him and took off down there. I walk in, there is some fat chick with blazing fake red hair behind one counter and a skinny twenty something chick behind the other.
Not a fucking guy in sight.
The unmistakable feeling of DOOM started creeping up on me.
I wind up with the skinny one.
I tell her what I want, the make, model, year and engine displacement.
I tell her the name of the part and SHOW HER A FUCKING PICTURE.
Nope, can’t find it, can’t even spell it right.
She shows me what she sees on the computer and it’s not even close. I try explaining another way to try and find it. She stops me and says she doesn’t know how to do that ,points to the far wall and suggests that maybe I can find what I am looking for on their “HELP” wall.
I put my hand up, tell her to stop and that she can’t help me. I leave. There is some other guy getting out of his car as I am getting in mine. I tell him to spare himself the misery,that they are absolutely incompetent in there. He grins and tells me he knows exactly what he is after. I laughed and said I even showed them a picture. Good luck pal.
I drove right back up to Tony’s Auto Parts, as I walk in the door, the guy I had been dealing with tells me he already ordered it because he knew I would be back.
I thanked him, gave him my number and came home to start in on this rant to blow off some steam. I wasn’t even half way through this when he called and said it was already there, they caught the delivery guy from the warehouse right before he made his run and threw it in.
It is sitting right beside me.
I would STILL be trying to find it if I had to keep dealing with the incompetent morons who seemingly populate every single parts house within ten miles of here.
Now if you will excuse me, I have shit to do.