The Christmas bullshit has started.
The Wifely Unit woke my ass up a bit ago so we can start the running around crap.
She was at least smart enough to have a cup of coffee in her hand as a minimal peace offering.
I gotta take her, the oldest boy and the niece out for breakfast.
I staggered around and got changed, went and had a smoke and poured the coffee straight down my throat.
While I was getting my clothes out I’m talking to the niece and she is sitting on her ass playing with her phone.
We all get ready to go and she declares she needs to take a shower.
Get the fuck in there, wash your little Hoo Ha and get the fuck ready to go chick.
While we are waiting on her ass, the Wife starts in on The Tree.
Gotta go get the tree today.
Mumble Grumble, Curse the day I was born. I fucking hate that shit and she knows it damn good and well because I hammer on it every year.
You go pick the fucker out then call me and I’ll go get it and bring it home.
Oh no, I have the day off today so I can go with, right after I pay for breakfast.
Oh by the way, I have something else I need you to go pick up, it’s a gaming cabinet.
I told her that if you tell me it’s at IKEA I will kill you where you stand.
Oh no, it’s at …. The Mall.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!
Besides ten thousand brain dead zombie motherfuckers all shuffling along in herds, do you know what else they have at The Mall?
I’m gonna be RAGING by the time I get outta that cocksucker.
I also have to drive over to Commieville and get more smokes sometime before Rush hour so my day is pretty much FUCKED before I open the front door.
It’s going to be a long day, I can see it coming.
I need more coffee.
Grouchy doesn’t even begin to cover it.
Look out you motherfuckers because I am coming your way.