It never ends.
Whoever owns this property went completely Apeshit planting trees and shrubs around it.
That’s all fine and dandy if you also plan on maintaining the shit.
Since it’s a rental now and there is a Rental Management company supposedly in charge of all of this shit, the place has gotten overgrown to the point of absurdity.
I have gone round and round with the inspector trying to get shit trimmed up, the neighbor got fed up and called them three times about the damned apple trees dropping shit in their yard, finally wrote them a letter and a month later I actually talked to the guy, heard about all of this from him and told him to trim the shit hanging over the fence as much as he wanted.
Fuck them people.
Of course two weeks later it’s time for the annual inspection and the shit hit the fan.
I told that guy about the neighbor, his un-returned phone calls, the unanswered letter and said I didn’t blame him a bit for trimming that shit.
That was a year ago.
My poor neighbor is one of those guys who’s yard is always immaculate.
Ours shits on his every time the wind blows because of all of the untrimmed trees and shrubbery.
The day before yesterday I came home from somewhere an there was a very unsubtle pile of leaves raked and swept up out of his yard and piled right on the property line on the sidewalk.
I might not be the most perceptive motherfucker around but I can take a hint.
So I have been out there bustin’ my ass, raking up wet leaves, trimming branches hanging over the sidewalk and basically doing what I can to mitigate the situation.
It’s not that I am unsympathetic to the situation, it’s just that having a perfect yard isn’t high on my priority list and I have other things to do besides raking a metric shit ton of leaves every time the damn wind blows.
So far, after about two and a half hours, I have COMPLETELY filled up the back of that El Camino with bags of leaves and trimmed branches and have only managed to get the one corner of the yard where most of these particular leaves are coming from and cut some of the branches hanging over the sidewalk.
Rental management company be damned.
I just stepped out the back slider to have a smoke and my jaw hit the concrete.
I swear to you, there are enough leaves back there on the ground right this minute to fill up a dump truck. No joke.
It’s like every tree, bush and shrub dumped their leaves last night, all at once.
It would take an entire landscaping crew all day to clean that shit up.
I’m one guy.
Old and busted up, tired as it is, take one guess what’s not going to happen back there any time soon. I raked enough that even with gloves on, I worked up a blister on my left hand on the side of my thumb right at the start of the web and then kept going until it popped, then kept going after that.
I told the wife a week or so ago that I was thinking about getting one of those cordless vacuum/mulcher gizmos to take care of this crap and immediately got an ear full and had that weed eater I bought a year ago thrown in my face, yet again.
I have some bad news for her.
Since I’m the motherfucker out there busting my ass, I’m gonna get whatever the fuck I want to make that shit easier.
I don’t give a fuck what it costs at this point and she can bitch until her lips turn blue.
A man has to do what a man has to do sometimes and fuck the consequences.