This Will Undoubtedly Be Interesting

The Wifely Unit texted me just before 9:00 last night to let me know some hose split on her car, dumping the coolant and stranding her with a trunk full of groceries.

She got a hold of her Niece and got a ride home so now guess who gets to go fuck with this tomorrow between 12:00 and 2:00 to try to diagnose it, get the parts and then replace them, in a parking lot somewhere, and it has been raining.

Oh yeah, she has to go with me.

She said there were two hoses and it was the bottom one.

This is on a 2002 Ford Focus with the twin overhead cam Zetec engine and my failing memory was flashing red lights as I read the text because I recall there being way more than just two hoses on that dirty fucker.

 

So, it’s off to Youtube and Google images, following links to Focus specialty boards and all that happy shit, trying to get an idea of what to expect.

ff3

I found this picture where someone else was having a different problem but it does give some idea of what there are for hoses, on the passenger side.

There are a couple more that go to that damn thermostat housing but it’s on the other side.

I’m just praying that it’s not the lower radiator hose, please, let it not be that dirty fucker.

Not in a parking lot, in the rain.

I vividly remember doing both the plastic motherfucking thermostat housing and the dirty cocksucker of a water pump in the past and my asshole immediately puckered up remembering just how much fun that shit was.

If I get lucky, it will just be one of those small hoses and I can cut and slap one on just to get her home again so I can get to work and tackle it properly on Friday.

Unfortunately, Karma seems to have kept a running tab on the thousands of transgressions I have committed over the years and has decided to put me on the installment plan to even things back out.

She never seems to miss an opportunity to fuck me but good every chance she gets.

We shall see.

Every once in a while someone with more stroke tells her to give me a break.

Thank you Lord, for every single one of those occasions.

 

13 thoughts on “This Will Undoubtedly Be Interesting

  1. My condolences with your car troubles. Sometimes, being handy with tools messes with your Life more than it fixes it. Save money but gain aggravation. I also hope the fix is the easy option.

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  2. Ya know, it could be 30 degrees below zero and snow past your skinny ass and having to replace a small hose… Happened to me here in the glorious State of South Dakota. Oh, did I say it was blowing 50mph and on a Sunday? Yeah, wife stayed warm in the only open auto part store and I could see her and the clerks laughing their asses off.

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  3. Hope you can get to each end without having to remove much else. Hint buy new clamps with the hose I hate fucking with old clamps. They always seem to break when tightening .

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  4. Bro,

    With all the old vehicles you have, can’t you get a towing rider on your car insurance? My shits all so old that I only have PL/PD on them. 1986,1986,2000.

    I got one with GEICO (spit!!!) and it is only 16 bucks a year, covers all three of my vehicles and I’ve used it three times over the last 10 years with no change in my insurance rates.

    Look into it, they’ll tow your shit to your house or a shop (within 30 miles), change your tire or jump starts. Pain in the ass is that I have to call GEICO (spit!) and they call the tow Co, adds about 20-30 minutes to the ordeal but at least I ain’t changing a tire in the snow…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, we have that, I just used it a couple of weeks ago to have that fucking Bronco hauled home after the brand new fuel pump shit the bed five miles from where I put it in.
      The wife was worried about getting the groceries home and the Niece was luckily nearby to haul her home.
      She said she didn’t want to call the tow truck because we just used that feature and hoped it was going to be a quick fix to get it home, which it was and there will be more said about that later, guaranteed.

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  5. One day, and its not an exaggeration to say it, the ways things are going men like us who persevere, who never quit no matter what, we are the guys thru history who grabbed their spears and ran towards the sounds of mortal combat, and surely will be lamented by the 10’s of millions of Wimmin’s who despise and spit on our manly traits: devotion, honor, duty, and personal courage.
    We again will be the truly desired ones. The protectors and providers of Women and Children. That we are now and not recognized as such is a commentary of those who deserve to find out the hard way. But good.

    Its no joke or small laughing matter fixing an engineering clusterfuck meant to be thrown away. The human race hasn’t changed much for all its history. Everything comes full circle, history having this circular feature to it will vindicate Patriarchy and Nationalism, Family legacy and Tribal vitality. And it will be us Men who can not only fix such a clusterfuck of consequence of idiots policies by petty tyrants in far off inaccessible places, shit boxes designed around fucking tree humper ideology and regulatory tyranny, but who out of self respect, never say die mentality, and devotion to our women, we fix what should be banned from a sane society, we always find ways to solve the most daunting and complex of those clusterfucks of unintended consequences. We persevere. Nothing is a substitute for this.

    Fucked up as it may sound, Men like us will become the most desirable respected revered of Men.
    We get things done. We do the undoable. We learn new skills at the drop of a hat, we prepare, we never quit, we are the Warriors when times are desperate.

    Even if our Women do not express it, except for the really psycho bitches most of us have the pleasure of contact with, they picked us, even if their conniving primitive she brains motives isn’t a clue to them, because we are those Warriors, in a time of universal gamma’s, soy boys and neck beards.

    So we all feel your pain Phil, we have empathy for your plight, we now the rules and duty, and the small honor barely recognized, and we are proud, no matter how we make joke and be sarcastic or snark we spread. Its our badge of honor.

    You fix that piece of shit Pal. Tell your wife you earned a sammich, a frosty, and a loving reach around. We said so. Tell her you are our Hero. You have our admiration and gratitude for not quitting.
    Right on Phil.

    Liked by 1 person

      • Appreciate you.
        How many of us will be willing to risk our bodies and lives, to come to the aid of the feminazi’s when it drops in the pot and they discover wimmin’s studies and Diversity are dress rehearsal for civil war which will eat them up for arse paper?

        Patriarch Bitchez

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    • When the lights go out and you are the only male around who knows how to build a fire, create a shelter and heat food gotten with knowledge nobody else bothered to learn, the truth you speak will be self evident in the blink of an eye and the dropping of panties soon after.
      Wimmins can be quite predictable at times after all.

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  6. PS, in a perfect world, its time to rip all that crap out, build that motor, give it a Turbo, chain up the tires, strip it to the bone for weight, and race it in the pony class, race it this winter on Berry Pond in Moultonboro on the ice.

    Like

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