There, I Fixed It

Just in case maybe someone thought I’m not a real Redneck……


Someone punched the drivers side door lock cylinder out of this Bronco at some point in the past and fucked up the sheet metal.

I have been meaning to do something about the big, rusty, gaping hole there under the handle since I got it and finally went after it this afternoon in between downpours.

It only took a couple of minutes to get the door panel off and then I dug around and found that half inch bolt with a nut and a couple of big washers out in the garage.

After I got the inner washer and nut fished onto the bolt, I started squeezing the sheet metal back into place a little at a time. Tighten it up, squeeze it a bit, loosen it up and move it over a bit and repeat until the sheet metal flattened back out and reformed the hole for a new lock cylinder, which I obviously don’t have yet.

Unfortunately, that is a ways off now.
You don’t just go buy a single door lock cylinder as far as I recall, you have to buy a lock set, as in three cylinders. Two for the doors and one for the tailgate, which also pushes on the window position switch to raise and lower the back glass so you can reach in and unlatch the tailgate.

Instead of going and getting a lock set today, I went down and bought a new pair of work boots which I have been needing DESPERATELY for a couple of months now.
I’m going to leave the bolt in there until I can get a new lock set just to make it a bit of a challenge to any would be thieving assholes and of course, as a nice conversation piece.

The old boots weren’t completely wore out or blown out, there was something fucked up inside the left boot that was part of the sole that felt like there was a damn rock in there about an inch back from where my pinky toe connects to my foot.
I do a lot of walking every day and for the last few months my foot would be sore every morning and be flat out screaming at me about lunch time. You kind of get used to the pain after a while but damn did it feel good to sit down.
In case you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m just a bit stubborn.

Enough was finally enough though and I double checked with the Wifely Unit/Banker Lady to see if I had enough dough left to go get some new boots.

No, I didn’t and yes, WE do.
You see how that works don’t ya?

Took some money out of savings and went DI-rectly to the fucking Redwing store a few miles down the road and got a new pair of steel toed shit kickers.
The fuckers weren’t cheap by any stretch of the imagination but I get reimbursed for them from work once a year, up to $200.
So in a couple of weeks I can take that money and give it back to the wife, if she don’t up and take it first of course.

Then she was kind enough to take me out to dinner and then she surprised the shit out of me.
I have also been needing a new phone since, I dunno, two years ago.
Off to the mall that was right next to where we had dinner and got me a new phone too.

She even dug in her ass pocket for it!

There was a bit of a cluster fuck involved in the process of picking out which one and getting everything set up but I’ll spare ya the details. Of course then, ya gotta get a new case for the new phone because of course the old case don’t fit the new phone.

So all in all, I didn’t get too much done today, but I did, if that makes any sense.
I’m going to be spending the rest of my natural life trying to figure out how to use this new phone and now is as good a time as any to get started I guess.

5 thoughts on “There, I Fixed It

  1. Had almost the same problem with my working boots a month ago. My small toe of my left foot kinda refused to mold itself to that darn steelcap and everyday in the evening I was beginning to hobble instead of walking because of the pain it caused.
    So I bought mea nice pair of Dunlops. No more hassles now.

    I‘ll be sure making a picture of one of the door handles of my car just in case you’d need some redneckish inspiration on repairs and will post it here along with a funny story.


  2. Phil a Wife buys you dinner and a phone. She also agrees its time to buy New Redwings, that would make me nervous . No I would be SCARED shitless wondering what she has in her sights on buying that I don’t know about and now cant say shit about. OR perhaps she thinks her stud muffin just deserves it . LOL yea you wish.


  3. Nice fix. Real Men figure such shit out. Others pay a Real Man to do it. Nice job using the bolt to squeeze the door metal back into shape.

    Well shod feet make for a better worker…less tired at the end of the day. Best to choose footwear over the door lock.


  4. A decent locksmith probably has the cylinders in stock, and in 20 minutes fit the tumblers to your key, and half the price of a lockset.

    Just sayin’


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